You Are Not Alone **
Depression. Anger. Feelings of worthlessness. “You’re weird.” None of these are you. You are as worthy of life and love as anyone on this planet, probably more worthy than many. There is nothing wrong with you. This is a public page. To make or respond to comments, you must log in and find the Blog entry ‘You Are Not Alone’ that will be dated near the same publish date of this page (8 April 2019). This is purely an informational page for those who have been driven to feelings of inadequacy, or depression, or even contemplating suicide, as a means of escaping the pain. The pain you suffer from cruel treatment shown you from society as a whole, or just certain segments, or an individual, simply because you are perceived as different. These people think too small. There is nothing wrong with you; it’s them. There are hopefully helpful links at the bottom of this page.
I recently read that suicide is higher among non-believers than among believers. The details and flaws of the study have since become widely known, but that hasn’t stopped the “religious” from using it as fodder against reason and free-thought. According to the article (emphasis added) “Interestingly enough, one of those reasons [for atheist’s depression] is religious believers themselves. We live in a world dominated by people who often fervently believe ancient superstitions and who many times demonize, harass, ostracize, and disown those who lack belief in those ancient superstitions. Atheists on the receiving end of this treatment are understandably stressed and isolated…Yes, atheists like many other marginalized minorities can be prone to depression and even suicide in large part due to the horrible behavior of many in the religious majority.”
“Marginalized minorities” – what a turn of phrase for those perceived as “different”. From easily visible differences like mode of dress to apparent physical gender to skin, hair, or eye color, to less visible differences like religiosity or sexuality. None of us are that different from each other. Many act much differently though, treating the “other” with subtle or blatant contempt or utter disregard for their humanity. We who are “different” are harassed, ostracized, or even dis-owned by family for non-conforming thoughts or actions. We may be denied service at certain businesses, or lose our job or be denied deserved promotions in employment. The problem does not lie with you or me. The problem is with those of such small minds. We are the ones who may be suffering though. Or maybe you’re suffering a recent trauma or loss. This page is for you.
Depression may just be the result of losing your social network – you have no one to talk to. Any church group you may have had has dropped you like a hot potato when you announced your doubts (about faith, sexuality, marriage or divorce, anything else). Friends (so-called) no longer want to hang out or just talk. You’re mocked by society at large, and rejected by your former peers. If you just need an understanding someone or group to talk to you are urged to become a member and post your comments or concerns here. We are not mental health professionals. We are just caring people mostly of non-traditional or no religious outlooks, who decided to share together here. We wanted a non-judgmental, sharing, learning community too. Humans are social animals after all. The links below are to more specialized mental health and suicide prevention specialists. Please contact someone for immediate attention.
National Suicide Prevention Lifeline – 1-800-273-8255
We can all help prevent suicide. The Lifeline provides 24/7, free and confidential support for people in distress, prevention and crisis resources for you or your loved ones, and best practices for professionals. 1-800-273-8255
https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org/ appears to have an online live chat
The National Domestic Violence Hotline – Call 1-800-799-7233
National Domestic Violence Hotline can help victims, survivors of domestic violence. Call 1-800-799-7233. Get help today.
Chat w/ an advocate on our website: https://www.thehotline.org/
Recovering From Religion – 1-844-368-2848
Aimed at web contact. Several phone numbers, and a real-time chat. https://www.recoveringfromreligion.org/
Clergy Project – Are you struggling with your beliefs but stuck behind the pulpit? Do you feel trapped with no where to turn? This may offer hope and ideas.
Grief Beyond Belief – a faith free support network. Online only secular support and social networking group. The library appears wide ranging (though a “warning – secular comments but from clergy members” appears on at least one entry, so I wonder just how “secular” they are — or maybe it’s because it is from clergy as a secularists’ heads up warning.)
http://griefbeyondbelief.org/
Secular Treatment Options – https://www.seculartherapy.org/ Register as a patient or as a therapist with no religious agenda. To ensure you can get the treatment you deserve, you may want to:
Write out a statement in advance to give to your therapist. I say write it out for two reasons, it is hard to say what needs to be said in the beginning. Second, putting it in writing and keeping a copy is a powerful message of what you expect. Feel free to tell them this was the advice you got from a Ph.D. level, secular therapist. Tell them something to the effect of, ‘I am here to deal with issues that include religious abuse or trauma. I expect that religion, faith, prayer, spirituality or the supernatural will have no place in our therapy sessions and that you will use only evidence based methods to include Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, Mindfulness, Dialectical Behavioral Therapy or other proven methods for dealing with the issues I need help with. If this is not your approach to therapy, I need to know now so I can find a therapist that does practice evidence based psychotherapy.” This may sound harsh, but any well trained therapist will smile, nod and say that is exactly what I provide. If they hesitate in their response, be wary. Remember, keep a copy for yourself. Also, if you cannot find a therapist near you, you can look for at therapist that will do distance counseling. Go to www.seculartherapy.org, register and search for distance counseling. To access the database, you’ll need to click on “Register as a client” Once you create an account you can reach out to therapist directly with inquiries. If you go to the front page, you can also hover on the map and see how many therapists are in your state.